Hi Everyone wanted to give you a update.

 Few months back i shared my story about losing my dog and uncle in small period of time. it has been a better grief period lately. I work with emotionally disturbed children and help process with them and de escalate them when they are upset. I have switched job which was hard for me because few of the children i worked became a strong bond. One of them actually wrote me a not saying we are gonna miss you and thank you for impacting us and having a adult who willing to talk with us. I loved this job but the team i worked with made it much more difficult to work with. Anyway i work with underprivileged children now and really looking forward to my new job. At a school you became part of a family kind of which is cool. Anyhow i been doing a lot better dealing with grief. Sometimes i still have my triggers because of my neighbor has the exact same dog as mine and same color so that kind of gets to me. I still miss him but i know he isn’t suffering.  My uncle told me once always remember who you are as a person and follow your heart. My uncle was a humanitarian  in which he worked with children who were underprivileged. Sometimes i feel like his message to me was go make a difference on people life so i am pursuing a masters degree in social work. Last few weeks i have done better to cope and use my outlets when i feel overwhelmed. Just wanted to give you all a update and know in life we all progress in different ways.  i hope everyone is safe and doing well. Stay safe and thank you for letting me giving me an update. Talk soon and will post with more updates!


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34 comments

  1. cindy024 Volunteer

    Hi, Nothlane1991,
    I have not yet read your other post but from this update I can say that I am glad that you are doing well, and thank you for sharing with us. Hope that you are continuing to pursue your career goals. Stay safe as well.

  2. eagle206 Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thank you for coming back with an update. Exciting to hear about your new job! It’s always tough to say goodbye to the people you used to work with but it’s clear you made an amazing impact on them in your time there. I’m glad to hear that you have been coping well and using your outlets. Healing isn’t always perfectly linear, so don’t worry if some days are harder than others.

    Stay strong,

    Tyler

  3. Ashley Day Captain

    Hello Northlane1991,

    Since your neighbor’s dog looks similar to the dog you had, it’s understandable that seeing the dog brings up emotions for you. When you feel overwhelmed, I encourage you to continue to rely on the outlets that help.
    In the past, I worked with children who had emotional and behavioral problems. Working with children who have trauma can be difficult but rewarding. I’m sure it felt wonderful to receive a positive note from one of the children. There’s no doubt in my mind that you learned skills from your previous job that you can apply to your new job. It sounds like you are following in the footsteps of your uncle and I’m sure he would be proud of you for working towards receiving a master’s degree in social work.

    I hope that you stay safe too!

    Ashley

  4. musicislove

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Tank you so much for coming back to update us on what’s going on in your life. Your new job sounds like it will be great and very rewarding even though you’ll miss the kids you worked with before. I hope that you enjoy the work you do, what you did before and what you’ll be doing now both sound like really important jobs and I’m glad people like you are in this world that want to help people. It’s understandable that you’re still grieving, seeing a dog that reminds you so much of your old one must be really hard, but it sounds like you’re coping with things well and that’s great! I look forward to future updates and wish you nothing but the best!

    Delaney

  5. snandi2 Volunteer

    Hey Northlane1991,

    I’m glad to hear that you’re doing better! Leaving your old job is definitely a sad thing to do, especially because you worked so closely with the children. However, this is a new chapter in your life and I hope the team you work with at your new job are much better than your old team! It’s amazing that you’re deciding to pursue a masters in social work. I’m sure your uncle would be proud to see you right now. Stay strong and please keep us updated!

  6. Neesha Volunteer

    I am glad you are doing better. I understand being sad about leaving your old job and being excited about the new one. It must be hard to see your neighbor’s dog that looks like your late dog. Grief is a process and it sounds like you are moving through it wonderfully.

    Thank you for sharing

  7. music2799 Day Captain

    Hi Northlane1991,
    It sounds like you’re doing well! I wish you luck at your new job, and it’s amazing that you’re helping children. I’m glad you’re using your outlets when you feel overwhelmed, acknowledging your triggers, and pursuing a masters degree in social work! Those are incredible steps in the right direction, and I believe your uncle would be proud of you.
    It’s great that you know we all progress in different ways. Thank you for the update. We’re here to listen whenever you need us, and you’re doing great!

  8. Bluebell13 Volunteer

    Dear Northlane1991,
    Thank you for coming back to let us know how you are doing and for allowing us to be part of your healing journey. It sounds like you are finding a way to use your gifts to help others. I am sure your uncle will be proud of you for helping children as well. Keep healing and learning. Please feel free to come back and update us as often as you would like, you are part of our community.
    Sending you love and strength,
    Roxie

  9. Starling Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,
    Thank you for continuing to share your story with us. I’m so glad that you are doing better now. Grief can be a long and difficult process, so it’s great that are moving forward. It’s great that you are furthering your education and your career as well. You have come very far, and you should be proud of yourself. If you ever need anything, let us know. We’re always here for you.

  10. rachelb098 Volunteer

    Hi there,

    Thank you for your update. Congratulations on your career advancement, it sounds like you will be doing amazing work just like your uncle did. After everything you’ve been through it’s completely understandable to still carry grief with you and I can’t imagine how exhausting that must be, but the fact that you’ve been able to keep pushing forward and focus on your coping skills shows tremendous strength. It sounds like you’ve got a well-rounded idea of what helps, and that’s incredibly insightful and resourceful. If you ever feel overwhelmed again and want to speak to someone don’t hesitate to reach out back here or text VOICE to 741-741 to speak to a trained counselor.

    All the best
    -Rachel

  11. Rustin Day Captain

    Hi Northlane1991,

    It sounds like even though you are still in the grief process, you are staying strong and staying focused. I know continuing school can be tough, but stick with it. The help you can give others with the degree will make the schooling worth it. Thank you for the update and I think from the sounds of it, your uncle would be very proud of the person you have become. Keep checking in with us and thank you for sharing!

  12. meg Volunteer

    Hi there Northlane1991,

    I am so happy you came back to update us. Thank you for sharing. I am sorry to hear that you’re missing your kiddos from your old job, but it seems like this new job is a wonderful opportunity! I think you’re absolutely right, we all progress in different ways. Do you have a therapist that you can talk to while you begin this new chapter of grad school? The workload might be intense, so you might want to have someone that can help check in! Check out the FIND HELP tab for some resources to help you find a therapist if that’s something you’d be interested in. I am sorry for your losses. Your growth, honesty, and vulnerability is inspiring. Thank you again for sharing with us! We’re always here for you.
    -Meg

  13. Breanna Volunteer

    Hey again Northlane1991,

    Thank you for coming back with an update. I’m glad to hear you’re doing a bit better now. There can be like a bittersweet feeling when you leave a job like that, where your coworkers make the job more difficult. But in both positions, it sounds like you’re doing really important work and impacting these kids in a positive way. That’s incredible and I’m sure your uncle would be proud. I hope that you also have the time and resources to process what you’re going through, too – and we’re always here. Keep your chin up.

    Sending you love and support,
    Bre

  14. CarmenR Volunteer

    Hi there Northlane1991,

    Thank you for coming to the site and updating us. I am happy that you have a new job that you are lookig forward to. It sounds like you have a lot of empathy and care for others, and I am glad to hear that you are progressing in your healing process. Stay strong and safe, and thank you for comnig back to share. We are here for you.

    Carmen

  15. aegardiner Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    It is good to hear that things have been going well, despite the occasional difficult day. It sounds like you have a great outlook on life and have had past events give you the extra motivation to make big changes in your life. It’s wonderful that you are studying social work and have the determination to help out others. It sounds like you are already doing that with your current job with underprivileged children. We are always happy to hear when people are doing well and love hearing the updates!

  16. Erin O'Callaghan Day Captain

    Thank you for coming back to share. I’m sorry you are still dealing with grief, but I’m glad you are doing better and found good coping outlets for you. I know especially in these times, that is definitely something to feel good about. Come back and share anytime-we will be here.

    Erin

  17. Lex Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thank you for coming back to share with us! I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your uncle and dog. It is completely understandable that you are still grieving, but I am glad that you have been doing better. It is so amazing to hear that you had such a strong impact on the children you worked with in your last job, that letter must have been so heartwarming to read. Congratulations on pursuing a master’s degree in social work! You should be so proud of yourself for all the things you have accomplished and are working towards.

    You are such a strong person! Please come back to share with us whenever you like. We are here for you, always!
    -Lex

  18. jao1820 Volunteer

    Hey Northlane1991,

    Thank you for keeping us updated, we’re here for you! I’s so sorry about your uncle and dog. Grieving is a long and hard process, its great to hear that the process is becoming better for you. As you proceed forward, you’ll look back and see how much progress you’ve made over time. Your emotions and feelings are valid and understandable, some days will be better than others and that’s perfectly acceptable.

    That is amazing how much you’ve impacted the lives of so many individuals in your past job, and now you’ll influence even more people in your new job. You have and will not only influenced the lives of those children but also their families, your work is so admirable!

    Your uncle must’ve been a very wise individual, and always try to remember his advice. From your message is it clear that you are pursuing an occupation that you are very passion about. I wish you the best of luck as you pursue a Master’s Degree in social work. Stay strong and safe! Thank you once again for keeping us updated.

    – J.A.O.

  19. JWorks Volunteer

    Northlane1991,

    I’m sorry about your uncle and your dog. Passing is rough a lot of the time. I’m glad your grieving has become better and that you’re doing better mentally. All of your feelings are valid and we will support you through them. Your uncle gave some sage advice to you and it was good advice. Your strength is admirable. We’re here for you so please keep us updated!

    -Jay

  20. Amysue43 Volunteer

    Thank you for coming back to update us on how you’re doing; we are happy that you did. I really appreciate how you mentioned we are all making progress in different ways as some things may look different for others. That shows me how strong you are in recognizing and implementing this concept into your own life.
    I’m sorry for the loss your dog and uncle in such a short frame of time. Those feelings can be overwhelming and frustrating at times especially at the beginning of it all. You’ve definitely shed some positive light on what you’ve learned from having those people (including your dog) in your life – remembering the wisdom shared by your uncle. It’s a beautiful thing that you will cherish. It’s okay to look back on these things and have feelings about them, so I’m glad you updated us here.
    We are here for you and want to support you in anyway possible.
    Stay strong <3

  21. adrian Volunteer

    Hi there, Northlane 1991-

    It’s understandable that you are still grieving. You are strong to reach out and give us updates! I can tell by your message that you truly care about the people around you and that you want to make a difference. How resilient you must be to go into social work! There are many families out there who could use the strength and resolve that you have to help them through difficult situations, especially as an homage to your uncle.

    We’re here to listen and support as you desire to update us. Keep fighting the good fight!

    Take care,
    Adrian

  22. lizzi

    Hi Northlane1991,
    I’m sorry to hear that you’re still struggling with grief and the loss of your dog and uncle. It’s very understandable that you’re still grieving, as that can take a lot of time. I’m sure it’s hard to see another dog that looks like yours, as I do the same thing with a cat I lost last fall. I still cry when I see other black cats, because he was so special to me. Your uncle sounds like he was an amazing person and had some great words of wisdom. He’s right… remember who you are as a person and follow your heart. I do believe that’s the key to happiness in life. Really nothing else matters. I’m sure he was proud of the work you’re doing, and depending on what you believe, he’s still proud of you even now that he’s gone from this world. I’m sure it was hard to change jobs, especially after bonding with some of the children you worked with, but what you’re doing now is so important too! You will make an amazing social worker and will help so many more people than you already have. Thank you so much for sharing this update with us and remember that we’re always here for you.

  23. Natalie M Day Captain

    Hi again Northlane1991,

    Thank you for taking the time to come back and share an update with us. It is great to hear from you! You are always welcome here at AVFTI! It is amazing to hear that you made such an impact on your last job – that is so sweet! And it is awesome to hear that you are continuing to work with underprivileged children and are looking forward to your new job! You are so strong and your story is so inspiring! Thank you for all of your work with underprivileged children ! Stay strong! Be proud of yourself! I hope you are doing well as well! Stay in touch if you would like <3

    -Natalie

  24. zelda Volunteer

    Happy Sunday, Northlane!

    I hope you are enjoying your weekend. I’m happy to hear you’re in a better place, grief-wise. Loss is probably one of the most difficult realities we are forced to deal with. I’m so sorry about your uncle and your dog. At least they are resting peacefully in paradise, far away from any pain and suffering.

    Congrats on pursuing a Master’s degree! That’s an amazing next step to take. The children you are working with are very blessed to have someone who cares so much about them. I’m glad they have you in their corner.

    Be proud of yourself for everything you’ve accomplished. You’re working on excelling in your new job, furthering your education, and strengthening your coping skills.

    You’ve made amazing progress, and I’m excited to see where life takes you. Thank you for taking the time to update us. We hope to hear from you again, and soon! ☮️

  25. Marissa Day Captain

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thanks for updating us! Your connection with your uncle and the work that it has motivated you to do is beautiful. I can’t wait to see all of the progress you make and all of the wonderful things you do for your community. Keep up the amazing work! You’re going to do great things. I can’t wait for an update! Stay safe.

    Marissa

  26. Solongago Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    I am sorry for your double loss. The grieving takes time and that is ok. I am glad that you are working with children that appreciate you and you can make a change for the better for them. That does help us when struggling through grief, that purpose in life. I think it is special that you and your uncle seem to have the same gifts and generosity, to have similar vocations. He must have been a special person, and it seems like some of that rubbed off on you. Changing jobs in the middle of a period of grief had to be tough, but if the co-workers/management made things harder for you, I give you Kudos for taking the initiative to improve your situation by moving out of that. One of my brothers who worked in nursing homes years ago, felt it was a trap, because you get attached to the people you are helping and that makes it hard to leave, when you really need to. I think wherever you go, you will be helping folks and sometimes you have to do what is best for you, so that you can be the best for others, if that makes any sense.

    Thank you for the update and it sounds like you have a lot of good stuff going for you, and that’s awesome.

  27. rohina_kumar Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thank you so much for coming on here and updating us. I’m genuinely so glad that your difficult period of bereavement is slowly easing out for you over time. I’m happy that you’re able to find a sense of purpose/meaning in helping others, while also taking some inspiration from a family member. It’s amazing that you’ve found some wonderful coping mechanisms and ways to engage yourself in therapeutic and de-stressing activities. Having to deal with triggers can be quite distressing, but as cliché as this sounds, it’s all part of the process. Coming to terms with these triggers is all a part of the healing process, which takes time. Overall, I’m glad you’re taking it one day at a time, acknowledging your personal development, and surrounding yourself with a lot of positive energy. We’re all so proud of your progress and hope you’re staying safe too. Feel free to come back on here and update us at any time! All the love.

  28. haesol Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thank you for updating us! I am happy to hear this grief period has been a bit easier to deal with, you are really strong to say that. I wish you the best at your new job, from what you’ve said and the kidwriting a note to you I can tell you really do your best at it and you’ve made a positive impact on those kids’ lives, you should definitely proud yourself in that! Changing jobs is chalenging, but I do hope the transition comes easy and you feel comfortable at it.
    Congrats on pursuing a masters! that’s incredible, best of luck on that!! I just want you to know you’re making an awesome work so far, both in terms of job and personal life–as you said, everyone’s progress is different, and you’ve been turning to your outlets whenever you feel overwhelmed, which is amazing.

    I look forward to your next update, stay safe

    -sol

  29. tbird830 Volunteer

    Northlane1991,

    Thank you so much for sharing this update with us! It can be so helpful for others to see that things do get better after doing through some hard stuff. It sounds like you’ve been doing some great, meaningful stuff since we last heard from you! Social work is such an important field and I’m sure you will thrive! Those kiddos need people like you! Wishing you the best of luck on your next journey and I look forward to seeing future updates from you!

    Tori

  30. brookeallnutt Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thank you for taking the time to give us an update! Switching jobs is definitely hard, especially if you’re leaving a job that you love, but I hope your new job goes well! I’m happy to hear that you’ve been doing better at dealing with grief, and that you’ve been taking good care of yourself. Stay safe, and as always we are here when you want to talk!

  31. Edjay Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    Thank you for the updates, it’s good to hear that it’s been a better grief period for you lately. It’s good that you recognize your triggers especially with your neighbor’s dog. It’s totally understandable especially since it sounds like they look so much alike. It’s great hearing that you’re going to be pursuing a masters in social work soon, I know you’re going to be able to make a huge difference in a lot of people’s lives. Please feel free to update us again whenever. Take care!

  32. jcas120 Volunteer

    Hello Northlane1991,

    It’s great to have you back for an update! That sounds like a really fulfilling experience you had and I hope you experience the same at your new job. I’m really excited to see that you’re going to school to be a social worker. It seems like you’d be really great at that! I’m sure your uncle would be proud. I’m excited to have you back for another update hopefully, you are doing some great work.

  33. candyappleb Volunteer

    Hi Northlane1991,

    I’m so glad to hear that you are doing well. Changing jobs can be challenging, especially if you love what you do. It’s unfortunate that sometimes the environment can be toxic in terms of coworkers. Congratulations on pursuing your masters degree. Look forward to hearing from you again soon.

    All the best,
    Becca

  34. Alyssa Day Captain

    Hi Northlane1991,
    I’m happy that you have been grieving better. I know that grieving is extremely hard. I lost my grandpa and even tho it has been months it is still so hard. It sounds like the kids you used to work with are really sweet. From what you said about them, it sounds like you left a huge impact on them and they definitely won’t forget you.
    When you see your neighbors dog even tho it can be hard for you just remember that your dog is looking down on you and is happy they are in a better place.
    Good luck with your masters degree. That is a huge accomplishment to get one. One of my friends is also getting a masters degree in social work to. Thank you for updating us.
    -Alyssa