The guy abused me for ten years straight. I escaped from his house after he knocked me out and set his house on fire.
I woke up and dragged myself outta the house and tried to ran to the police station but I couldn’t and I passed out in the yard. I got moved to the hospital by my brother and my father. They stayed with me until I woke up. My father continued to work the investigation from his house until I was able to be myself. I now suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder come when someone suffered a Traumatic experience like war or physical abuse. My brother went back to the ruble of the house and went searching for a piece of mail with the guys name on it but he couldn’t find anything.
I didn’t wanna go back to school after my whole incident because I knew everyone was gonna bomb me with question seeing if I was okay with everything that happened. I ran outta school crying my eyes out because my attacker was on school property and the teacher weren’t doing anything about my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I ran back into the woods where I built a treehouse to hide when I was upset. My father and brother came to the school and had to come look for me. My brother knew I was gonna go to the tree house since he helped me build it. My brother climbed up the steps and saw me crying in the corner of the treehouse and come over and gave me a big hug. He got me outta the treehouse and got me over back to school and he stayed with me for a while.
During the day, My brother had a police call he had to respond to and he left me alone for 10 minutes and I flipped out on a teacher and I flipped a table and I got sent to the principal’s office. He called my father and my dad came back to the school and signed me out for rest of the day. My father took me home and I locked myself in my bedroom for the whole night to the point where I wasn’t eating or not showering because I was scared to do anything because of my scars I suffered during my abuse. My scars where so bad that I couldn’t wear shorts and tank tops but as I got older, my scars started fading to the point where I got to wear shorts and tank tops again.
I hate having Post Traumatic Stress Disorder because I can never be myself anymore without freaking out or trying to hurt myself. When I freak out, I punch walls and I cut my hand and arms up with my keys. I want help but I am afraid to ask for it because of my past history. I have a coping skill of talking to my staff when I become upset and wanna do something stupid. My father and my brother to this day is still looking for my attacker and they have no luck locating him. My brother works around the clock to help me get the confront I need to put me at ease. The other coping skill I have is looking up photos on my phone of camouflage and military pictures. My father is really concerned about me because he also has Post Traumatic Stress Disorder because he was a military personnel.
My father had a very bad experience with war where he lost his whole unit in a car bombing and he was knocked out cold for two weeks. When my dad woke up he didn’t know who any of his kids where including me. I was scared that my father was dead because he wasn’t responding so anyone at all including the doctors and nurses. He was moved into mental health after a couple of days in the hospital. I would visit my father when I can because he was the only one who understood me and what I went through for ten years. My father started to open up about his experience and his nightmares were going away. His keep up with meeting with his therapist and doing things to keep his mind off his Traumatic experience.
My nightmares keep going on for weeks after weeks to the point where I just wasn’t sleeping. I was falling asleep at school and I was failing my classes. My nightmares got to the point of being so bad, my brother took me to a mental hospital. I was at the mental hospital for two and half weeks. When I got to the hospital, I refused to attend groups because I didn’t wanna open up about my experience. The only way I opened up was with my therapist with a one-one session. My therapist got me to open up within the first couple of days seeing him.
My father got outta mental health two days before I got released from my therapist. My father picked me up along with my brother and we went out to dinner. I told my father about my time with my therapist and how we did different activities to get me to open up about the abuse and rape. The day after I was a completely different person because I was much more happier and I was calm. I was more focused on school and I was trying to bring my grades up from F’a to at least B’s or A’s at least. My final grades in school were all A’s and one B. When I brought my report card home to my father, he was excited that I was changed.
I never wanted to get abused but I was stupid as a kid and I took off because I got mad. My father come after me but I told him to leave me alone. I ran off into the woods and that when all hell broke lose. I got lost and I meet this strange and at the time I didn’t know about “stranger danger”. I asked the guy if he knew how to get back to the main part of the woods and that when he took my hand and took me into his van. I though he was gonna drive me back to my house if I showed him where I lived but he never did take me home.
The house he lived at was a white 3 story house in the middle of nowhere and it had a high fence around the property. He took me into the house and brought me into the big living room where he lit a fire in the fireplace. He made us hot cocoa with mini marshmallows. He asked what I was doing in the woods alone. I said that I got mad at my father because my father shut off the power to all my electronics because of my bad behavior during the week. I am watching a movie while the guy tries to contact my father to let him know that I was safe. My father never answered any of the guys calls which means my father was super pissed off at me.
I fall asleep on the guys couch and then he started touching me. I woke up to the guy on top of me and he was trying to have sex with me. I pushed him off of me because I was only 8 at the time. He pushed me back into the couch and held me down with all his force. I tried to scream but he held his hand to my mouth. He dragged me off the couch by my hair and took me to his bedroom. He forced me onto the bed and I begged him to stop but he wouldn’t listen.
Ten years later, I turned eighteen years old and I was gonna be celebrating it with a total stranger and not with my family. I knew my father was out there hopefully looking for his little girl. The guy took me out for my birthday but he was nervous that I would be seen. He went out and bought me new cloths which were black dress pants and a nice collar shirt with a tie and a suite jacket. He also brought me hair dye so I can change my hair color. When he come home, I went to the bathroom and dyed my hair black. Once my hair was done completely, he watched me shower and then I got dressed.
We went out to a really nice restaurant and I ordered two hot dogs and Macaroni and cheese with a glass of water. After dinner, he allowed me to order a dessert. The dessert I order was New York Style Cheesecake. Once we were all done with dinner, we went back home and watched television for the rest of the night. He allowed me to watch whatever I wanted to. The show I put on the television was M*A*S*H. The owner went to bed around 10pm and I fell back asleep on the couch.
I woke up early in the morning and I tried to run away from the house. The owner come down and hit me in the head with a table lamp. I went down hard to the ground. He poured gasoline all over the house and lit a match and the whole house went up in flames. I woke up and tried to get my self outta the house. I made it out the front door and fall on the front law. The fire department rode up and got me far away from the house. I started to freak out and the one firefighter grab my arms and held me down before I punched him or anyone else or tried to harm myself.
My father pulled up onto the scene of the fire and saw me on the ground with firefighters on top of me. He pulled me up off the ground and hugged me close. He put me in front of his police car and he seat in the drivers seat. He asked me if I was okay. I didn’t respond right away as I crying as I watch the house burn down. My father jumped outta the police car and went over to the fire chief and asked what happened. The chief doesn’t know without doing a full investigation.
Me and my father go back to my father’s house and I go back to my childhood bedroom. I scream out in pain because of my burns. My father comes into the room and takes my to the hospital. We get to the hospital and I get taken back to the trauma room where I get examined. The doctor come in and starts cleaning my wounds up and I cringed in pain. I stay in the hospital for three days to have my wounds looked at. The doctors comes back into my room and looks at my wounds.
Once my wounds completely healed I went back to school. My father went to the principal and told him my past history with not trusting a lot of people anymore. The principal keeps a close eye on me when I was at school. I would sit outside even when it was down pouring because I didn’t wanna make any friends because I was scared that I would get abused again. The principal come to the cafeteria and watched me through the windows of the cafeteria. The security officer went to the principal and keeps an eye on Jen so the principal can go back to work. The security guard turns his back on on me for two seconds and I walked off of school property.
The security guards takes off after me and he stops me in the middle of the road. He grabs me before I get hit by a car and takes me down the ground on the grass. I get away from him and the principal comes outta his office and I stop in the tracks. The principal takes me back into his office and he slams his door behind me. He looks at me and doesn’t say much. I say to break the tension “ I am sorry Sir, but this is my stupid life.” The principal replies back “ you have an awesome life. It ain’t stupid”