Sometimes demons come back

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Yesterday morning I had to pick up the rest of my things and I stopped by my mother’s place.

Crystal insisted in coming in, so as we went in, I could feel something was off.

Wanting to get out as fast as I could, I went upstairs to my room, when I heard the office door open and the bitch that walked in on me in the bathroom was all in her glory.

In the empty bedroom she asked me what does it feel like to desert my mother the way I did, when I didn’t answer she began getting physical, and punched me in the stomach so hard that I fell into a chair nearby.

Crystal came running upstairs and got between me and the woman likewise did the same to her only so hard she hit the hardwood floor

Giving us time for us to get out as the woman was trying to pull herself together.

Apparently my mother was at the doctor, while this psycho is taking care of her.

Since then I discovered that all my belongings are gone, the few friends I have are convinced that I’m going to hell, for leaving my mother, as well as me and Crystal living together.

I told Crystal how sorry I was in dragging her into this horrible life and family I have.

All she did was just hold my hand and tell me she loves me and wouldn’t have it any other way.

I find it sobering when I think about all the demons that I’ve had in my life, and here this beautiful woman doesn’t care, she just wants what’s best for me, and loves me unconditionally.

It’s still hard to accept that I deserve to be loved, but each and everyday I see my angel, I can that not only do I deserve to be, but that I am loved.

Join the Conversation


  1. MH Volunteer

    Hey again focus.1968,
    I’m sorry that this happened when you went to pick up your stuff from your mother. Do NOT listen to your friends. You deserve happiness!
    I am again so happy that you have Crystal with you throughout all of this.

  2. music2799 Day Captain

    Hi focus.1968,
    I’m so sorry your friends turned on you and about what happened when you stopped by your mother’s place. You don’t deserve to be treated that way. I am proud of you for getting away and starting over, and I’m so happy that you have Crystal at your side. You definitely deserve to be loved and treated with respect. If you ever need anything, please feel free to update us. We’re here to support you.

  3. gordonsv Volunteer

    Thank you so much for sharing! You do deserve to be loved and I am so happy that you found someone that is so accepting and loving 🙂 This is EXACTLY what you deserve! No matter what you have done or been through, you are a person who has valid feelings. If your “friends” believe you are going to hell, then I do not believe you should be friends with them. It is important to surround yourself with people that value and love you for you, no matter what! Never feel like you are worthless or do not deserve to be loved! Continue to be strong, continue to love, and continue to live every day happily. You are worth so much, never forget that. If you ever need resources or simply someone to talk to, please let me know! I would love to be there for you.


    1. focus.1968

      Thank you, around this time if the year it gets very difficult for me. This is around the time I was raped in 1981 when I was 13, it makes me just fall apart sometimes. Even though I know my angel is supporting me, I hear her crying sometimes cause if the hell I’ve been through, thanks for listening.

  4. enimsaj

    I am so glad you have Crystal by your side. You are worthy and deserved to be loved. We have to do what is right for us emotionally and mentally and some people may not understand that if they are not in that situation. It sounds like you are doing what you need to do and that is all that matters.

  5. Megan Volunteer


    I’m sorry that your family life is rough; I understand how hard it can be. Sometimes leaving your family is necessary for your personal health and development, and that doesn’t make you a bad person. My two older siblings don’t talk to my mom anymore because the relationship was so difficult that it was negatively affecting their mental health. It’s okay to take your space from your mom if you need it. Also, it’s really great that you have Crystal around to help you with these hard times. Finding someone that accepts you wholeheartedly is really something special. You do deserve to be loved, and I’m glad that you’re starting to see that. I’m excited for you to continue to grow.


  6. Erin O'Callaghan Day Captain

    That sounds so scary-I’m really sorry that happened to you. I’m glad you were able to get out of there safely, and that you had Crystal there to protect you. Thank you for sharing an update with us.


  7. rkr18 Volunteer


    I am so happy that you have someone that treats and accepts you for the wonderful human being you are. Also, genuinely happpy that you are feeling that you deserve that. We want the best for you so please continue to keep us posted.
    With all our love

  8. Solongago Volunteer

    I am sorry this happened, and no, neither of you deserve any of this. If we are looking for silver linings, then this incident can be remembered if you are ever in doubt about choosing the path you have chosen and the distance you need to keep from significant members of your family. You have to keep away from abusive people. They murder us from the inside. Sometimes the only think we can do is walk away from the situation and keep our distance.

  9. Hannah

    Hey there,
    I’m sorry you went through that. Crystal truly loves you and I’m glad you have her in your life. You absolutely do deserve to be loved, no matter how people act to you. Keep staying strong. We always appreciate hearing from you.

  10. Alyssa Day Captain

    Hi focus.1968,
    I’m so sorry this happened. You and Crystal did not deserve that. I’m happy you have each other to cope with what happened. When something like that happens you don’t want to be alone. Things will get better when it is just you and Crystal.

  11. blashea Volunteer

    I am so sorry to hear that happened. You do not deserve to be treated that way at all. I am proud of you and your strength. I am so glad that Crystal was there to support you.

  12. Bluebell13 Volunteer

    Dear Focus.1968,
    I am so sorry that your family and former friends have done this to you. It is awful to be treated as if you are the villain when you were the one being mistreated. I am so glad that Crystal was with you and that she tells you how much she loves you and reminds you that none of it matters now because you have a new life together. It is okay to walk away and let it all go.
    Sending you both love and strength,

  13. Turnschaosintoart Day Captain

    Hi Focus,
    That is just awful to hear. Im sorry that you were treated that way. In a way though it was painful you now have a clean slate and don’t really have to back there. Glad Crystal was there for you and she is always supportive and showing you you are loved. Much love