It’s late at night and yet I can’t sleep. You’ve all read my previous story and were kind enough to leave me comments for me to read. I want to thank you for doing that. I had a lot of anxiety in me then. I still do now. So, I thought I’d give you all an update on how things are going with me.
Like I said I planned on telling my mom that Asshole was blackmailing me for sex and treating me like shit.
The very first thing I did that morning when I woke up was to check my text messages.
I had a message from Asshole. It was a picture of him spreading open his hairy ass and showing off his asshole. He said, “Take a good look, Cunt. Today’s the day you become my full toilet. I’m going to sit on your mouth and you’re going to choke down my shit.”
That caused my anxiety to go through the roof. I gagged at the thought of that. His piss tastes awful. And although he’s made me clean his dirty penis after anal sex with me, swallowing shit itself is a whole new horror I didn’t want to go through. I can’t believe he’s so abusive. I don’t know why he’s like this. He seems so angry at me all the time and for no reason. I never tricked him in the relationship. I never teased him. I was just me. Unfortunately for me I have a body everyone wants to have sex with.
That gave me enough motivation to finally tell my mom what was going on. She was not as sympathetic as I wanted but was as sympathetic as I expected. She didn’t believe me when I said he stole the pictures and stuff from me. She shook her head and said, “Stop lying. You’re a slut. You took those pictures and sent them to him to please him and now you regret it.” She also doesn’t believe what I’ve been going through is rape. I haven’t told her everything that he’s done, specifically the toilet related stuff, but that was still disheartening. She said that being blackmailed is a consequence of me being a slut and if I didn’t want to continue having sex with him that I could have stopped at any time.
Look, I love my mom. And she loves me. But when it comes to sex stuff she is crazy and super old-fashioned. To my mom a girl’s vagina doesn’t belong to her. A girl’s vagina belongs to her future husband. Same deal with virginity. If my mom finds out that you lost your virginity to someone that isn’t your husband, not that she ever asks that question, she loses all respect for you. My mom is even against things like trimming your pubic hair even if that’s just to fit into a swimsuit. So, her anger and disappointment at me? I understand that. I hate that but I get it. To her I’m a slut.
But she did help me. She called the school. Got in touch with the right people. Our schedules, mine and Asshole’s, were changed so I won’t run into him at school. I basically have an ‘in school restraining order’ against him. The school people don’t know the real story. Mom said that he and I were going through a bad break up and that I needed space away from him.
After that my mom told me to tell Asshole that I wouldn’t have sex with him anymore. I asked her if that was really the best way to handle things because he has my pictures. She said that he was probably going to have my pictures for the rest of his life. She said he probably had already shared everything with his friends. She said he was either going to follow through with his threat and he’d back off. She said that if I wanted to talk to the cops about Asshole and things like that then I could. She didn’t like the cop option. Remember, she doesn’t think what he did was rape, so she told me to, “Think twice before you ruin a young man’s life just because you didn’t say no.” That’s a brutal thing to tell your fucking daughter in this situation. I don’t know if I could talk to the cops anyway. Not now anyway.
I wasn’t going to school. I wouldn’t see him in person.
I texted Asshole and told him I was done being his bitch. Asshole immediately threatened to send everyone my nudes. My heart was beating but I told Asshole I was done. I could tell Asshole was furious.
Asshole said, “I don’t see why you can’t be a good cunt and obey me like you should. Remember you had every chance in the world to stop this.”
And then he did it. For a solid ten or twenty minutes I didn’t know. But I found out. Asshole sent people my nudes. And when he said ‘everyone’ he meant as many people as he could. My mom got my nudes. My brother. My extended family. My friends. My class mates. My teachers. Strangers. Everyone. And I imagine the people that got my nudes shared them with other people they knew.
I know because my phone started blowing up with text messages.
“I always knew you were a fucking slut!”
“Nice cunt, baby! It’d look better if you trimmed though.”
“STAY AWAY FROM MY BOYFRIEND YOU FUCKING SKANK!!”
“Wow I love your boobs!”
And so on. And on. And on.
Asshole not only send out my nudes but he sent out my name, address, phone number, email address and basically every way he knew how to contact me.
Asshole did it. He really fucking did it. My life is ruined. The only thing I can think of that isn’t horribly wrong is that people don’t know the truth. They think I’m a slut and that I really did send him all those nudes. Everyone just thinks this is a bad break up. They don’t know the truth. They don’t know how he’s been raping me or pissing into my mouth or wanting to shit into my mouth. And you know what? I can barely handle this shit now. If ALL those people found out the truth that would be the worst possible thing that could happen, and I don’t know what I would do.
My life is utter fucking shit. Everything is ruined.
And I know the guys loved seeing me naked. I’ve gotten texts from all sorts of strangers. You want to know how dick pics I’ve gotten? I have 40 since my nudes got out. FORTY. Guys showing me their erections and asking me if I’m interested, or if I want to be with a ‘real man’. Some of them are extremely rude and call me ‘cunt’ too just like Asshole. I will never understand why guys think it’s okay to send pictures of their penises to strangers, especially after something like a girl’s nudes being leaked.
I got more texts from Asshole that night. Asshole sent me a picture of a toilet bowl filled with one of the biggest lengths of shit I’ve seen coiled up in it. Asshole said, “Every single bit of my shit here should be inside of your stomach right now, Cunt.”
I asked him why he was such a monster to me.
Asshole said, “You’re a cunt. I’m a man. Cunts obey men.”
I asked him how he could hate girls and women so much.
Asshole said, “Your tight little slits between your hips mean you’re inferior. Cunts are good only for sex. Cunts are delusional if they think they’re equal to or superior to even the lowest man. Men like me are GODS compared to cunts.”
Asshole sent me ANOTHER picture of his erect penis and said, “See this? This means I’m better than you. Come over and suck me now, cunt. I’m not done with you by a long shot. You need to learn to obey.”
I told him I was going to block him on my phone and I never wanted to see or talk to him again. I told him that I was taking screenshots of all his text messages that he sent me, backing them up somewhere safe, and if he continued to harass me that I was going to go to the cops and have them arrest him for being a monster.
Asshole said, “No one believes a cunt, even with proof. No one cares about cunts’ feelings or thoughts either.”
I blocked him and turned my phone off. I wanted that to be the end of the day. I was so exhausted. I just sank into bed. I wanted everything – the storm my life has become – to stay on the outside. Without my phone I could pretend everything is normal.
I cried and cried and cried. And then I slept.
Just as an extra bit of humiliation I was passing by my brother’s room. His door was a little open and I saw what he was looking at on his computer. It was one of my nude pictures. It was the picture of me with my feet behind my head, the one where I’m spreading my ass open for the camera with a smile on my face. And you know what my brother was doing? He was masturbating. So I have to deal with THAT shit too now.
This is my fucking life right now. And as much as I hope this is the worst its going to get, I don’t think so. I’m going back to school Monday. Back to the school where everyone knows what I look like. Where everyone thinks I’m a disgusting slut.
The school wants to talk to me about Asshole too. I think they want to talk to him as well. I don’t know what’s going to happen and I really just do not want to find out.
Thank you for reading this. I’m sorry that it’s another long rant but everyone and everything is terrible right now. I hope you others are doing much better than I am.