Needing help

Hey everyone, I hope the new year will bless us, and make living a little easier.
I try my best to keep busy around the house, since I’m in recovery for PTSD, depression, bipolar & anxiety. It’s really hard to find a job that’ll accept my mental illnesses, so I’ve been struggling mentally just trying to get through the day without breaking down, so if anyone has any ideas on jobs, volunteer opportnunities, or ways to keep myself busy so I’m not going off the deep end, that’d be great…
The busier I am, the less focused I am on what happened, so any suggestions would be helpful.
As I sometimes tell myself, it’d be better if I were dead so I wouldn’t feel like a burden, you know? But what more can I do? I just need something, or someone..


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16 comments

  1. Turnschaosintoart Day Captain

    Jamie,
    HAPPY BELATED, 2018.
    Sorry I am a little late to the party. Your post is so relateable to me. I have been exactly where you are. For me personally working full time jobs with a bunch of people always triggered anxiety. I found that working part time with a small job was better. If you like kids and are interested in watching them part time after school care. Com is a good place. It was always something different and new. I also found getting invloved in a physical activity/class or gym is good too. Keeps you active and mind off things. Personally I loved martial arts. It helped a lot with the anger part of my bipolar. Plus by getting in a gym or class you meet people and sometimes are lucky enough to find a place where you feel like you belong.
    Also if id like to suggest it you have ptsd and anxiety look in to EMDR treatment. It Is a pretty effective way to over come trauma and to deal with triggers when presented with them.
    And don’t ever say you are a burden because your not. You are here for a reason and a.purpose. I’m glad to see that you have a positive attitude about 2018 and want make things better for yourself. That’s awesome. I wish you all the positive vibes. And best of Luck This year Make 2018 your own
    Kristin

  2. Heather GG

    Hi – if volunteering is an option for you vs a job, you could reach out to places like your local food pantry and pet shelter to see what kind of help they need. Maybe a pet shelter where you could go help with the animals like walking the dogs, etc. You could also reach out to your local United Way and see what kind of volunteer opportunities they could connect you with.

    You aren’t a burden.

  3. music2799 Day Captain

    Hi JamieMarie25,
    I’m sorry you’re struggling, and you’re not better off dead. From the comments I’ve seen you post, I can say that you’re helping a lot of people. We’re happy that you’re a part of our community.
    Maybe you could learn about something you’ve always been curious about. There are a lot of online resources and classes you could take. You could also see if there are local volunteer opportunities or join (or start) a local volunteering group.
    If you ever need to talk about anything, feel free to write back. We’re here for you.

  4. MilkySwan

    Dear JamieMarie25,
    You are not a burden, and not better off dead. I struggle with the same Mental Illnesses, it makes trying to live and thrive a lot harder when most of your time is spent surviving and trying to balance the highs and lows. Keeping yourself busy everyday is a great start to trying to stick a routine down that will keep the lows a lot more steady, at least when I started to keep track of my good and bad days and what type of hobbies or chores kept me more motivated and positive. If volunteering is something you are interested in, look at any local Humane Society if you like animals, food banks and homeless shelters, after school programs for younger kids like YMCA. Craigslist is a great place to post an Ad or daily searching until something that strikes you comes up for a job. I nanny and it’s changed my outlook on my own character and how I handle jobs. I went job to job to not working a lot, it made me feel terrible and I blamed my Mental Illness for a longtime. Care.com is a great place to start if that is something you would be interested in. You can personalize and search for families and times/days that work the best for you and if you are keeping track of your high and low periods you can be more prepared when scheduling work days. Just a few ideas, best of luck and if you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to message anyone on here including myself or we can hook you up with some professional help.
    Manika

  5. kelly Day Captain

    Hi, JamieMarie25. You’re not a burden, and things would not be better if you were dead. If you ever get to that place, please reach out to us or try texting the crisis line as others have suggested. I know those feelings and how hopeless everything can seem, but it’s not reality and it’s not permanent.
    Volunteering for this site has helped me a lot in dealing with my own issues. I struggle with self love and acceptance, but responding to other people’s stories and having empathy and love for these strangers helps me to have a little bit more for myself.
    Please let us know if there’s anything we can do. We’re here for you.

  6. Bethany Volunteer

    I don’t think it would be better if you were dead. I think you have an incredible purpose. If it gets bad, you can always text VOICE to 741741 and you can talk to someone who can help you immediately. A lot of places hire at home call positions. Have you checked into those? I know Apple hires at home customer service reps. Other companies may too.

  7. Erin O'Callaghan Day Captain

    It would not be better if you were dead. You aren’t a burden to us. We want you here. We don’t want you to go anywhere. I have found that volunteering with kids has brought me so much joy-they always know how to make you happy and they have such a beautiful outlook on the world. And they love it when those who are older than them want to work with them and talk to them about their lives. Let us know how else we can help you.

    Erin

  8. Ashley Day Captain

    Jamie,

    Searching for jobs can be emotionally and physically draining. It sounds like you know that keeping yourself busy is beneficial; it’s admirable that you’re trying to push through each day. What kinds of jobs and/or volunteer opportunities seem interesting to you?

    If you’d like, I can send you a list of coping skills. I know that you’ve been volunteering with A Voice for the Innocent for a while, so there’s a chance you might have seen me give this list to other storytellers – Please don’t hesitate to tell me if you have already looked at the list; I have other resources and I wouldn’t mind giving them to you.

    It sounds like you want to die. Are you thinking about suicide? I’m here for you.

  9. Kristen Eby

    Hey JamieMarie25,

    It’s good to hear from you, although I hate that you’re coping with this right now. I’m glad you’re a volunteer with us and it helps some! There are always more ways to get involved, though. Animal shelters and schools are always looking for volunteers, usually on a flexible schedule. You could also consider Crisis Text Line, although it is a larger time commitment.

    I promise it wouldn’t be better if you were dead. The world is a brighter place with you in it. I know you’re not a burden to us, and I would guess you’re not a burden to others either. We’re glad you’re here and part of our community.

    Please let us know if there’s any other way we can help!

    Kristen

  10. CarmenR Volunteer

    Hi JamieMarie25,
    I’m very sorry that you have been having a hard time, but you can get through it. I hope you know that you would not be better off dead, and that you are valuable to this world. Keeping busy helped me throughout my healing process as well. As others have mentioned, we are always taking volunteers. I know volunteering with AVFTI helped me immensely. There are other options as well, like animal shelters. Listening to music or reading a book can also help! Please stay strong, and know that we are always here for you!

    Carmen

  11. Marissa Day Captain

    Hey JamieMarie25,

    I’m really sorry you’ve been struggling. Working through those kind of issues can be hard, but please know that we are here for you if you ever need to talk about anything. You’re not a burden. We’re here to help.

    Do you like animals? There are a ton of animal shelters all over the country where you could just go and cuddle with animals! I know that always helps me relax. Or perhaps you could volunteer a couple hours a week at a retirement center – those people are all so appreciative for the company so you would be helping so much.

    Please let us know if you need anything. Stay strong <3

  12. Jacqui

    Hi JamieMarie25, I’m happy to hear from you. I want to start off by saying you would not be better off dead. You are a not a burden in any way. I think volunteering would be helpful to this feeling. You should be proud of yourself for taking those steps to help yourself. Some ideas I have, maybe you could volunteer for a soup kitchen, an animal shelter, senior center, we are also always looking for volunteers. There are many places that look for volunteers. I know classrooms always will accept volunteers too! Let me know if there is any else we can help you with!

    1. JamieMarie25 Volunteer

      I’ll hopefully be out next week, so I’ll definitely see what I can find.
      Thank you!

  13. Alyssa Day Captain

    Hi JamieMarie25,
    It’s good to hear from you. I’m sorry you are having a hard time, but it is good that you are staying positive. If you want to volunteer you can volunteer with AVFTI. We are always looking for new volunteers. You can also write. Writing is very therapeutic and will also keep you busy.
    I hope this helps. You will find a job soon.
    -Alyssa

    1. JamieMarie25 Volunteer

      Hi Alyssa, I already do volunteer for AVFTI, and usually do my writing on Wednesdays & weekends.
      I’m just having a bad day, especially since I don’t have therapy again until sometime next month.

      1. Alyssa Day Captain

        Oh that’s great! I didn’t know that. Hang in there you will be okay. If you need to talk you can DM me on slack.