I don’t really know how best to talk about all this, but I’ve been holding everything inside for too long and I just want to explain everything anonymously. I need to vent and build up courage to tell my mom what’s happening even though I know she’ll probably get pissed off at me for it. So, I kind of want to get everything off my chest so I can focus on the important bits and tell my mom the right way and calmly, but I can’t tell her the full story with all the details.
I’m 15 years old and in high school. Puberty has hit me very hard. I don’t know to best describe it, but my body is sexy and my boobs are enormous. I’ve been getting sexual attention since I was 11. Right now, is no different. Because of my body I’ve always been bullied for my looks by other girls. I’ve been called a slut more times than I can remember, just because of my body. Guys have been nicer to me but it’s obviously just because of my body. You ever have a guy come up to you and try to trick you into rubbing your elbows behind your back? I get that every day. The guys that aren’t nice to me call me things like, “Hooters”, “Cow Tits”, “Milk Jugs”, and “Titty Monster” all for obvious reasons. The only thing every one of them have in common is that they stare at my boobs. Not even the quick glance kind of looking but the creepy full on stare. Some assholes are so bold that when I talk to them, they’ll try to have a conversation with my boobs. I hate that. People treat me like a blow up doll and not a person. I fucking hate it.
Because of all the sex attention I got I never dated until months ago. Let’s call this guy I dated Asshole, because that’s what he is. Because I already had a bad reputation because of my body I wanted to keep things clean and nonsexual. I wanted a boyfriend, but I didn’t want to have sex or do sex stuff. When I started dating Asshole I was a complete virgin in every way.
Well because I didn’t want Asshole to get any ideas, I told him up front that he and I would never have sex of any kind. I told him he couldn’t have my body in that way. I even got specific and told him he would never have sex with my vagina, my butt, my boobs, or my mouth, or even see me naked. He seemed upset but eventually he agreed to all that. I would not have dated him if he complained right then and there.
Well, Asshole and I dated. It was kind of weird having a boyfriend. I’ve always kept guys at an arm’s length away because they all just want sex. Well Asshole was cute and funny and said all the right things. I got used to him. Liked him. Loved him. I’ve never been in love before. I lowered my guard.
And so, I ignored all the little things Asshole started doing that made me uncomfortable. Like slapping or grabbing my butt. We’d hold hands, sure, but sometimes in public he’d clap my ass and keep his hand there, squeezing me as we walked somewhere. I hated that but I didn’t know what to say. I told him to stop a few times, but he never did. Asshole wanted sex and he kept dropping ‘hints’ about that. About how ‘good’ girlfriends ‘took care of’ their boyfriend’s ‘needs’ and all that. That he couldn’t wait to see how I reacted to the size of his cock. To the taste of his cum. I just wanted someone to love. He and I used to hug a lot and it was about that time I realized the reason he loved hugging and cuddling with me so much was because he loved the feeling of my boobs flattened against his chest.
This next part is important. And I want you to understand I did this all in complete privacy in my room. I have a camera on my phone, just like everyone else. Well, there’s one thing I had never done before that I wanted to try out. And that was to take naked pictures of myself. I saw other girls online taking pictures of themselves. It looked fun. I wanted to know if I looked good or not. I know guys think I’m super hot, but I wanted to see if I thought I looked good naked because sometimes with how big my boobs are I feel like a freak.
Mom always warned against me taking naked pictures of myself. Threatened me, really. “Only sluts take nude photos of themselves and send them to guys or put them online.” But this was just me and I wasn’t going to send the pictures to anyone. Especially not Asshole. He would have gotten the wrong idea.
So I stripped naked and started posing. I took a lot of pictures. A lot of just my boobs from lots of angles. Pictures with my face and my boobs. Close-ups of my pussy and ass. Full body pictures. With the delay timer I took even more daring pictures. I took a full body picture of me on my bed hooking my ankles around my neck while I used my hands to spread open my ass, all with a smile on my face. I took a few shots of my hairbrush’s handle all the way in my pussy.
I even made a few videos – videos of me topless with my hands behind my head and shaking my boobs at the camera.
And I never sent them to anyone. Never moved those nudes anywhere else. NEVER. The nudes were on my phone for only a few days before I felt ashamed at having taken them. I look like a total slut in my pictures and videos. So I deleted them. That should have been the end of the story.
But it wasn’t.
Asshole got more demanding. Eventually he got pissed off and grabbed my boobs through my top. I was so embarrassed and scared I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t fight him or slap him or his hands away. I just let him play with my tits like a complete coward. He was way too rough, and he hurt my boobs. My boobs were bruised afterwards.
I could barely sleep that night but knew what I had to do.
The next day I broke up with Asshole. He was PISSED OFF. He called me a “fucking teasing cunt bitch”. It was so bad. I cried. But it ended. I thought it was over.
I kind of talked about it with my friends. I gave them the full details. They weren’t sympathetic at all. They couldn’t believe I hadn’t sucked his dick because, “Sucking dick is what girlfriends do”. They couldn’t believe I hadn’t even shown him my naked boobs. The way they talked about it I was the bad guy in the relationship, and I should have felt bad for ‘wasting his time’. I felt like shit. It felt like everything was my fault.
And that was that.
Until a little more than a month ago.
Out of nowhere I got a text from Asshole. It was a picture of his erect dick. He said, “I’ll forgive you for everything you’ve done and denied me if you suck my dick, cunt.”
I told him to go fuck himself. That was a huge mistake.
In a few seconds he sent me a video. It was a video of me shaking my boobs at the camera. One of the many nudes that I had deleted. He said, “I tried to do this the nice way and ask you to suck my dick like I deserve but you were a cunt like usual. Unless you want this and every other video and picture you’ve taken sent out to everyone you know, you’re going to do everything I say from now on.”
My heart stopped in my chest. All my muscles tightened up. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t believe that he had got my nudes somehow. I had never sent them to him. I had never shared my phone with him. I never left my phone by itself. I have no idea how Asshole got all those pictures and videos. And he has ALL OF THEM.
Asshole’s next text said, “Take off all your clothes, cunt, and send me a picture of you fully naked within the next ten minutes or else EVERYONE gets to see what you look like naked and what a whore you really are.”
I didn’t have a choice. I did what Asshole said.
He said, “Good to see you can follow orders, cunt. You’re my slave from now on. Never forget that.”
And that’s how Asshole started. For the past month he’s made me suck his dick so many times. I hate it. I hate Asshole. He never calls me by my name anymore. My name is Cunt. He’s stolen my virginity. He’s stolen my anal virginity. I have nothing to give my future husband now. Nothing. Asshole has had anal sex with me and then made me clean his dick with my mouth. It’s one of the worst tastes imaginable as you can guess and is completely humiliating.
Asshole has even used me as a toilet. By that I mean pissing into my goddamn mouth and having me swallow it all down. He even made me thank him for doing that. He’s even said that eventually he’s not going to just piss into my mouth and that I’ll become a true human toilet. Asshole has literally said that soon one day I will be swallowing HIS SHIT STRAIGHT FROM HIS ASSHOLE.
I can’t take this fucking shit any more. I fucking can’t.
So tomorrow I’m going to tell my mom what’s going on. I need her help to stop Asshole. I don’t know what’s going to happen and I’m scared. I fully believe Asshole will send out my nudes like he threatens the instant he realizes what I’m doing. I’m so scared but I’m going to do it. I’m not backing down again. I’m going to tell my mom what’s happening and everything that happens next is what needs to happen. I can’t be Asshole’s slave anymore. I won’t be his slave anymore. I won’t be his fucking toilet. I won’t swallow his shit.
I’ve cried and I know I’ll cry much more in the future, but I need to do this because Asshole is only going to get worse to me if I don’t. I’d do it tonight but it’s way too late and I don’t want to wake up my mom.
I’m going to tell her in the morning. Wish me luck because I know it’ll be a disaster. How do you even tell someone about this sort of thing?
Thank you for reading all of this. I’m super emotional right now I know it was a bad read. Asshole is just a monster. He makes me so sick. I can’t believe I loved him. And I feel like such a slut for making those nudes pictures in the first place. And I know this was a rant and I’m sorry, but I just needed to get this all out. It took me so long to write this. It was just gibberish at first because I was crying but I cleaned it up so people can understand me.
Thank you and I wish you all the very best with your own problems. I hope after I tell mom that the worst will be over.