I was at work today and I blew up at one of my managers, Lola. She was being very rude to me to begin with and I just couldn’t take it anymore.
I know what I did was wrong; I shouldn’t have been so mean to her but I’m not a pushover either. When someone attacks me I attack back, which is ironic because throughout all of my abuse and rapes I wouldn’t fight back. However, when somome is consistently trying to be hurtful, I have no problem voicing my opinion.
I’m going to call into my work and apologize to her in the morning. I feel bad. I’m normally not so bitchy towards people but the stresses of the day and of work, coupled with Lola’s remarks really got to me.
I’ve never snapped at another manager or employee before, and I’ve worked at many different places. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I just hope I don’t get fired because I really need this job.
Has anyone gone through something similar, where they just lost it at another person? I think one of the reasons why I’ve been so on edge is because I’m dwelling on my trauma. A lot of my trauma I’ve endured over the past two years, for example, I’ve been raped 4 different times in the year 2017 and in the year 2018. It’s a lot to handle, and there’s so much more. When I’m thinking about my trauma I can’t focus on my work, and that’s why Lola was so rude to me.
Even though she got on my nerves, what I did wasn’t okay. I realize that. I just hope I can make it right. I’ll keep y’all updated. Hopefully, she accepts my apology.