Reliably on a two/three year cycle my ex/rapist/abuser has crawled out of the woodwork and engaged with me over a video I posted on social media calling out his wife for her stalking. In theory I know I should ignore them because engaging with them offers the gratification and validation they’re looking for. They’re both emotional vampires who feed on the drama. It’s a very predictable pattern after enduring it for so many years. In years past when I’ve ignored them instead of engaging with them the harassment gets worse. They will escalate from cyber stalking into physical stalking and resort to petty vandalism trying to get me to react. I’ve pretty much figured out what they want from me to curb the physical harassment, and while it doesn’t leave me in emotional turmoil anymore it does get very tiresome. Their retort this year is the same as it has been for several years now: that I’m “paranoid” for catching them in the act or calling them out for their piss poor behaviors. It’s all a smoke screen trying to deflect attention away from their own poor behaviors. Like… it’s obvious. Anyone with an ounce of rational thought can see right through them. I *know* exactly what’s going on. I know continuing to engage with them in anyway is entirely pointless, but I do for the sake of protecting my children and trying to keep my ex at a “safe” distance. I know he’s trying to make me regret telling my story. He’s found me here and he reads my posts. It feeds his addiction just like anything else to do with me he comes across, and yet I feel obligated to speak out LOUDER every time he tries to silence me. It’s been almost 12 years since the relationship ended and he’s still vehemently trying to silence me. He’s grasping at straws and trying every trick up his sleeve. With someone trying so desperately to keep me quiet, I feel like my story definitely needs to be heard. I can’t tell if it’s admirable to keep fighting for my voice despite the every growing opposition, or foolish. It hasn’t stopped me yet, but I do have to wonder.